....so extra random

Wow! I haven't been on here in quite some time. I think that's a good thing. I can't rally find anything to complain about. Ok well I can :) but I'm happy with my life. My academics are on track and I'm putting more time into effective studying. I am seeing the results of my hard work and I absolutely love it. The only thing that is stressing me out is that I have not found an apartment for next year. I'm hoping that I find something soon because apartment searching is taking over my life. Lol. I have a feeling that I'm going to find something soon. =)

Has complacency become the new black? This was the question that popped into my head this morning. I could not answer it at the time. After thinking about it, I'm not sure. People deserve honesty but in the end, when all is said and done, who does the honesty benefit? For the longest time, I believed that being honest was for the sake of the other person. But after having real life experiences I realized that the honesty benefits self. I have to become honest with myself, first and formost. With that said, I have realized that I am angry about a certain friendship that I have. I am not being fulfilled but I think that is partly my fault. I used to turn my schedule upside down and do all these other things for this person knowing full well that she would not do the same. At first that was okay because I was okay with being complacent. I was accepting this person's behavior because I blamed it on how they were not realizing that I was allowing things to go on. I was allowing my niceness to be abused. So when I realized all of this, instead of getting mad with myself, I got mad at that person and did not say a word because I was afraid of opening Pandora's Box. I've decided that I don't want to be complacent anymore. I had to do something. I had to analyze the situation within myself. I aksed myself alot of questions. I can't worry about the state of our friendship because I have to believe in the friendship and that I've been a good friend thus far. I can't worry about it. I've been there when most would have left. So I guess complacency is not the new black. :)